A Fox in Heat

So, I am a literature scholar who loves horror. I write horror. I edit horror. I publish horror. I study horror. I even run a horror tabletop game every two weeks. But...I can't stand watching horror. This "can't stand" is very specific. Gore doesn't bother me too much (unless we're entering Saw or Human Centipede territory). Creepy things don't bother me. It's mostly just two things: suspense and cruelty. Regarding the first thing, I hate the walk up the hall with the music silent, knowing there's something right around the corner. You're just waiting for the "beat to drop." And that scares the shit out of me. I always hated jack-in-the-boxes too. Fuck those things. Regarding the second thing, I hate Quentin Tarantino. Even the famed Inglorious Basterds. I hated the jovial laughter of killing people, even the Nazis. I hated the smiles and jokes of being cruel to someone, even if they "deserve it." Some horror films are supe...

Sorry all for the delay in posting. My life has stayed busy with my PhD comprehensive exams, final papers, grading student work, and starting to help my boyfriend move up to Michigan. But a couple weeks ago, Absinthe and I had a long-distance date. I am surprised that even at the end of the 2010s people still wonder how that is possible. We play board or card games, watch movies, stream one of us playing a video game while the other watches, play 20 questions, and, one of my personal favorites, fuck. On this date, we started by playing an NSFW card game. I'd hold the cards up to my phone camera so he could see what he drew, and I wouldn't. And I wouldn't have to cheat or anything with that. It worked out surprisingly well. Then, Sin loaded up some horror video games I had planned for him. Some were serious. Some were glitchy. Some were campy. Some had spiders. It was a blast for me watching him go through all of them. It seemed like he had a lot of fun, and I like w...

For those who know me well, I am an open HIV activist and advocate. What does this mean exactly? It means that I promote specific values and politics around HIV: People with HIV are still worthy of their life, love, and even intimacy. People who are HIV-undetectable cannot spread their HIV, period. That info is not commonly known. Words like "clean" are serophobic and not exactly progressive. It implies a moral uncleanliness. It is not a medically used word. There are laws and policies that discriminate against people with HIV even if it is more treatable than things like herpes (for example). People often use HIV as a weapon against bareback sex practices, even though there is nothing inherently wrong with those practices. While it is "risky," any sex is a risk, and for some reason our current culture punishes people who are open about their undetectable status over people who don't get tested and assume they're negative. But of course, this mea...

So, I'm bigender. That means I rock both masculinity and femininity, depending on the day. My pronouns are flexible. I go by he, she, or they, and no real preference honestly. Sometimes, I get to explore my bigender identity in the bedroom, too. Last time Absinthe was up here, I had a good two outfits I wore to experiment more with my feminine side. And he loved both of them! The first one was a red slip with red panties. I usually don't feel comfortable in my feminine mindset unless I'm shaved a bit and feel like I can rock the look. I don't buy into the whole "passing" discourse. -cringes- I just like to feel sexy, and I define that for myself in different ways. Sin loved me in this slip, and that made me feel super sexy. When he calls me sexy, that turns me on too, obviously. He apparently liked me so much in them that he ended up fucking me against the bookcase.   Video here . The second outfit was a bit more involved. I posted a c...

When I lived in Nashville, I once had a fairly scary hookup. I was in a particularly horny mood, so I didn’t talk a whole lot before the planned hookup. But I knew what I wanted, something kinky. I wanted to feel dominated. This guy invited me over, said he was super into bondage and roleplay. We discussed a safety sign, and then I headed over. It was fine to start. He was rough and dominant. He tied me to his bed and started fucking my holes. That’s when it got scary. As he fucked me, he’d lean in close and snarl in my ear: “How about if I just keep you here instead? You want that?” I responded no, that I had school and work. “So? You won’t need that. You could be my permanent house boy instead. Whore you out to all my friends. You like that?” I shook my head no. I was genuinely terrified. I never used my safety sign because he never broke any limits. But for at least half the session I was genuinely scared he wouldn’t let me leave. I was terrified of him. Then when ...

Weasel bait apparently. When Sin left Michigan the last time, I wanted to treat him to one more round of hardcore sex. He went to take a shower before we left. All his stuff was packed. I said I'd join him in a minute. While he got the shower going, I stripped in the bedroom, put on my red and black harness, got the chastity cage on. About that time, he came out of the bathroom to come check on me. I audibly went, "Aip!" and tried to close the bedroom door on him saying I'd be a minute. Got my tail plug in, collar on, pup hood on. I opened the door, went to the bathroom, and got on all fours, crawling up to the curtain. He stood over the edge of the tub and face fucked me before dragging me into the shower with him. I helped him clean up like a good boy, and then he lubed me up and started pounding me. I'd arf and bark and yip, and he'd tell me what to do. At one point, he fucked me so hard, my cage came off. (I probably hadn't put it in sup...

In case you couldn't tell, I like semipublic / outdoors sex. Kind of a thing. It's not really the thrill that does it for me. It's more...naturalist. I like feeling dirt under my feet, wind against my skin, the smells of the woods around me. That does it for me way more than the thrill of getting caught. I have no interest in that! So, last time Sin was up here, I took him to a park I frequent. It was midday on Friday. I didn't think it would be too busy. It was. But I knew all the hills, all the off-path places we could go. He knew what I had in mind even before I pulled him off the trail. I found a good series of hills and took us past two or three of them. We could still kinda see the path, but people would really have to stop and stare really hard to make us out. And they probably wouldn't have a good image of what we were actually doing. I got on my knees and pulled his pants down, immediately taking his cock into my mouth. I was vaguely aware that he w...